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It's Hard to be the On-Call Parent

A bit of a departure from writing about kids, this ~2 min ScaryMommy piece offers an honest look at my life as the work-from-home parent. A friend recently called this being the "house spouse." It's the combined pressure of meeting too many professional demands and proximal parenting and partnering ones.


Here's a quote from the article to give you a sense of what I'm talking about:

For nearly a decade, I’ve worked from home. When my kids were little, I ran a school, often logging 12-hour days watching other people’s children. This work made me miss so many moments of the boys’ early years. Becoming a “work from home” parent was supposed to make life easier and more enjoyable. I was finally able to take my kids to school and see them when they got home. I would “save” time from not driving to and from an office. My husband commutes, so one of us would be close in case a child needed something. Turns out, our boys need things all the time. And I am suffocating under the avalanche of the mental load of being mom and the proximal parent. Not to mention the professional load of trying to succeed at my job. I know this would be monumentally harder if I was solo parenting, but even with two of us it’s too much.

Caretaking is hard, no matter what version parent you are. It was hard when I worked away from home, and now working from home. It is hard with a full-time job, but felt equally difficult during my maternity leaves. It makes me rethink village life. There's wonderful wisdom in living and raising your kids in community.

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